Gael's Blog

Confidence Challenge June 2014: Recovery tips for football losers and you

Sunday, June 15th, 2014



Spain disappointment


The night before last, I did something I haven’t done for four years. I watched a football match.  Anyone who knows me in the UK might now be thinking, how did she possibly agree to spend her Friday evening doing that?

The answer is because I have a very clever husband who knows how to tug at my heart strings!

At dinner, he said casually “Do you remember four years ago I joined you in a bar the night Spain won the world Cup? I couldn’t believe my eyes. You were all dressed in red and yellow and had the Spanish flag tattooed on your face?”

Of course, I remembered.  And instantly recalled that night in full glorious technicolor and digital sound.  It was one of the most exciting and amazing emotional experiences I have ever had in our second home country, Spain. I screamed and cried for joy along with all my friends and the rest of the population who thronged through the streets all night. Confidence beamed out of the whole nation for many ensuing months in spite of their biting recession.

“Well”, my husband tentatively added   “They are playing against Holland tonight in their first World cup match.  I thought maybe we could watch.”

As no doubt the whole world now knows. Spain was shamefully and shockingly thrashed by Holland.  (In case you don’t remember Holland was the team that spain beat in the final 4 years ago. )The emotion shown in this photo would have been shared by Spain’s supporters across the globe.

The big question now is how will the team regain their confidence after such a gutting trauma?

If they want to have strong lasting confidence that will see them through the next month or so, I hope they will first take time out to recover emotionally. To do this well  they  would need to take  these five steps:

  •  Step 1.  Openly and honestly talk about what happened from their own perspective.
  • Step 2. At the very least, in private verbally give vent to their true feelings
  • Step 3. Take comfort from whoever is kind enough to give it
  • Step 4. Give themselves a compensatory treat
  • Step 5. Listen to their manager and others who will help them see what happened in perspective.  (e.g. This was just one game and not the end the end of their worlds.)

After a disappointment or failure, we are often too quick to wound ourselves or others further with blame. Or, we may drown our sorrows until we con ourselves we don’t care. Alternatively, we may rev ourselves up too quickly with positive fighting talk.

So your Confidence Challenge this month is to watch out for any disappointment or other emotional hurt you may receive. However small that hurt may seem, you will recover your confidence more securely if you train yourself to take those five steps before moving on.

Have a good month!

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